Sunday, November 22, 2015

Professional Jealousy


Romance authors are a tightly-knit group. At chapter meetings, we cheer each other's accomplishments, commiserate with each other if the news isn't so good, and pass out a lot of chocolate. On the national level, we get to know other authors who are enjoying the benefits of their hard work, and realize folks like Nora, Julia and Jayne Anne are really normal, down-to-earth types who have labored for years to get to the heights they're now at.

While I'm on the same page as my chapter mates with my pleasure in other people's success, I find myself occasionally wondering why one person is successful and another can't get any traction. I hold myself and my books up for comparison with others and find myself wishing that, for one moment, I could be in their shoes.

Most of you know by now that The Voice is one of my favorite shows. Not so much for the talent,  but because I love the interaction between the coaches. I always find some kernel of wisdom to take home.

This week, Pharell Williams told one of his team that if you wish to be like someone else who has made it in the industry, you'll always be second best. He said the only person you should compete with is yourself, and try to do better every week, every month, than you did before. Once again, Pharell's words resonated with me.

So, from here out, I will compete only with myself, and will continue to applaud the accomplishments and success of others. Thank you, Pharell, for once again reminding me of what is important.  Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.

22 comments:

  1. I can fall into the what about me trap. But what I've learned is no one is ever an overnight sensation and if I'm feeling down about my work (and sales) I need to work harder.

    May not be the best advice I give myself, but at least it's under my control, and most things in this crazy business aren't. :)

    I'm boycotting The Voice even though I love Pharrell. I'm mad at Blake. :)

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    1. I hear ya, Lynn. I referred to Blake and Miranda in one of my books. Now, I have to change it. Pisses me off that he couldn't keep it together.

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  2. I need to take Pharrell's advice as well - there are times when my pity parties can be quite elaborate. I will concentrate on my own work and marketing in the future and remember to celebrate the joys and successes of my fellow sisters. Lol

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    1. We all have pity parties from time to time. The last one I had forced me to take a workshop to improve my craft. Money well spent.

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  3. Ha! Becky, Lynn, and Kathleen, thank you! I was having a pity party yesterday, and then I walked the beach, felt the sun on my face, enjoyed my doggies' joy, and said to myself, "It's all good." You are alive!" Pharrell is right--- be happy!

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  4. It's hard NOT to compare myself to other more successful authors, but when I really examine what they've released, I usually see that they've been publishing longer than I have, and they have more books out.

    On the positive side, when I look at my own sales I see that I continue to broaden my reach with each book I release, so if I just keep at it, I'll make it one day. I need to remember to look back over the past year and be proud of what I've accomplished!

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    1. I agree, Sheri. Sometimes we get so caught up in measuring our results against others that we forget to reflect on all we've done. We can all be proud of ourselves. 90% of all who begin to write a book never finish. We've done that, and plenty more.

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  5. Excellent advice from Pharrell. I must start watching The Voice.

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    1. Pharrell is a fount of information, every season.

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  6. Wonderful advice, from both you and Pharell. I watch The Voice only rarely but I agree that every time I do, it is inspiring on so many levels.

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    1. Thanks, Jacqui, for visiting today. I go through periods when I wish I were Nora but then I think of her life and her obligations and rethink. I'm where I should be right now. And Pharrell agrees.

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  7. I absolutely agree, Becky. I'm glad of Pharrell's reminder. We can all do more to be more supportive of one another. Thank you for this post!

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  8. We're all in this together, aren't we? Thanks for taking the time to visit today, Piper. Hope to see you again soon.

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  9. Hi Becky! Great post and GO Pharell!! Love the advice - it's true not only in our professional achievements, but in life. One of my very favorite poems is Maxx Ehrmann's, Desiderata which hangs in my office. Blend Maxx and Pharell and you've got a plan:)

    Have a lovely Thanksgiving!

    Best,

    Mary

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    1. Of course I had to look up the poem first, but I agree. Blending Maxx and Pharell is a great idea. Thanks, Mary, and happy Thanksgiving.

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  10. Good words to live by. Create your own path. Be original.

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    1. That's right, Barb. It's our uniqueness that makes us special. Another Pharell quote.

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    1. Thanks, Caroline. I think we all need to take a step back from time to time and appreciate how far we've come.

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  12. I'm with you, I love The Voice, and I'll be watching tonight! Pharell has turned out to be a wealth of wisdom! I actually am not interested in competing with anyone else, I simply want to be successful in my own right.

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    1. Good for you, WW. Pharell and Usher have both surprised me with their words of wisdom. I appreciate them both.

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